My bottle opener just broke off in the cork
They don't teach how to cope w these situations in boy scouts
I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
you kept say ridiculous things then repeating them in perfect classical latin. You are onee intelligent drunk
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
On an unrelated note: I'm also a big advocate of the "never waste a boner" theory.
Taking shots with an iv of fluids in, because I work tomorrow. That's responsibility. Employee of the month right here.
SHE GRABBED MY FULLY ERECT DICK IN A BAR AND STUCK HER TONGUE DOWN MY THROAT AND I COULD NOT CLOSE
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize