I wasn't interested in him...but then he played The Office theme song on acoustic guitar. I'm sorry.
Yeah, the furnace guy just pulled out 4 empty and 1 full beer bottle from the vent. You are no longer allowed over.
YOU GOT KICKED OUT OF FIVE GUYS LAST NIGHT FOR THROWING PEANUTS AT THE PEOPLE WHO WORK THERE?!
correction: escorted out
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
the remote is under the fat chick passed out on the couch. Good luck .. and may god have mercy on your soul.
The bad news is tonight is also a blue moon, ergo, latin, I will have to get 'once in a blue moon' drunk which I feel is significantly more dangerous than IPO drunk
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
We don't know where he is but he left his pants and what appears to be a tooth here so he's gotta come back sometime
I need to wake up with a beard between my thighs more often, I'm a fucking saint.
Do you think the police would frown on me opening a psych drug pharmacy on the side? Just to dispose of my drugs without polluting the water supply! It is for the animals!
I hate how she's getting mean with age
Meh, you can't hate. That's our basic life goal and you know it.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
You tore a poster off a lamppost and ATE IT. That drunk.
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Randomize
