omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
i keep seeing random pieces of my outfit all around town.
I've spent the last three hours watching 30 rock and eating marshmallows and ham. I'm considering taking up weed to justify my lifestyle.
Just made hot dog dorito pasta. It happened.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I'm seriously considering selling my books back early. I don't use them anyways and I could really use the beer money..
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
Randomize
