wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
The guy at the liquor store just checked my id and said "oh it's you"
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
No, this is non-alcoholic oatmeal.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
FYI, Sammie and I made the executive decision that we're getting a pet octopus and keeping it in the ballpit. Just thought you should know.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Shouldn't have fucked on the top bunk, I bounced so high my hair got caught in the ceiling fan and almost broke my neck.
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
Been trying to fuck him since december. Finally got him into bed and he was uncircumcised. Why do bad things happen to good people?
God this is like a meg Ryan movie without the restaurant orgasms
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
Randomize
