No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
downstairs . braiding the drunk passed out girls hair, she will thank us In the morning
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
I threw up on my way to work while listening to "the good times are killing me". this award goes to modest mouse for creating the most poetic puke ever
You remember the guy they called Meat in high school? Well, let's just say my vagina remembers him now.
It was a fight. Me vs nature and drunkenness. And nature won. Big time.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
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