Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
That's what you get when you play shuffleboard drunk.
There is no way that a naked man in your kitchen can be explained-away as a "misunderstanding."
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
I joined the mile high club last night. I ran a mile while high on coke. It was glorious
Oh my god I'm in a public bathroom with a space heater. I never want to leave
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
My credit card got frozen due to suspicious activity. "Let's go over your recent transaction history... it looks like these are all at bars." BITCH, DON'T JUDGE MY MONDAY NIGHTS.
Yeah bc that's when u should take a Molly. At a house party with everyone from ur hometown
I'm drunk listening and crying to Selena. How's your Monday?
I'm just too horny to handle empty house
Randomize
