I smell stomach acid.
I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
You were partners with her mom and you began calling her "the Robert Horry of beer pong" You also kept telling her that she was hotter than her daughter.
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
Can we make sure camping doesn't turn into forest-orgy?
Lol, last year was UNREAL
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
Do you know how many guys' fantasies I've been told I'm a part of lately?!
Just 2. But still.
I guess the lesson here is that I shouldn't send nudes to elected officials.
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
Let's just say, I will never again lick an asshole.
Randomize
