Seriously, I'd take them all over any of the milfs here...and you know how much that means coming from me
My mind says no, but my body says yes.
What does your body say about chlamydia?
I cant talk right now they are about to fuck again
We Started drinking at 8am and left the bar around 11pm....I hate ALL green things
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Why did you put hummus in my pillow case?
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
I'm now drinking beer through a straw. By order of the bartender.
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
So my parents just watched me pour their rum into a bottle and only add crystal light powder, no water... Talk about being judged. All I could say was "Cortland tricks?"
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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