Just had another dream about being on Real Chance of Love. I think it's a sign.
It felt like his penis had an endoskeleton.
just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
threw up in the kitchen showroom. home depot employee of the month.
Then, halfway through our conversation, I remembered what you drunkenly told me last night and was all "maintain eye contact, do not look at his massive penis".
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
a guy offered me a piece of pizza if I'd make out with a random girl. We got the whole damn box and I ain't even mad
We almost drove away from the bar with a British stranger in our trunk...
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
Randomize