The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She said I was the most selfish person in bed she's ever been with and she's fucked Tucker Max.
He wants to hookup..at the fair..this is our chance to leave him stranded with no clothes.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I consider myself to be an upstream bisexual
You're the salmon of the gays...
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
His mom finally got over her shame and smoked a bowl with us. Merry Christmas to all aka me.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
This is a crisis. I had a huge crush on him in seventh grade and now his girlfriend is due to have his child on my birthday. HIS CHILD CAN'T BE BORN ON MY BIRTHDAY.
so i went to the bathroom and my thong was on sideways... i guess that solves the mystery
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