my drunken desire to be gossip girl continues to ruin friendships for me
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
its not fair. if i was a guy, i'd be getting a high five for banging two in one night.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Matt's offering to breast feed it.
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
dad says come back and get the lawn mower out of the pool before mom gets home
Just made my first drink, took 2 sips feel like god
Randomize