If i come over, it means nothing
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
Btw, just wanna point out that you've hooked up with two guys whose birthdays are today. Congratulations, you have a type!
Complete silence. Background Willy Wonka music. An empty back of Lay's BBQ chips. These are the ingredients for an extreme acid trip.
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
He is nice. Kind of short though. But didn't try to rub his jean cock on me.
Which I appreciated.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
