So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
I had to explain to the waiter that I'm not the DD because I can't drive, but as the Designated 'Make Sure No One Gets Roofied Or Hit By A Car On The Walk Home'-er, I should still get the free drinks.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
So this whole chlamydia situation totally puts a damper on my back to school sex schedule, there's just no way of knowing who of them was the perpetrator... Time for new candidates
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Got 2 free lines of blow from some random guys on the side of 13th street.....how's your Sunday going?
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Is that your Nuva ring on the floor? Shit must have gotten crazy
Randomize
