i wish i could watch tv and lissten to music at the same time...but still understand both
i think otters can do that
there is a polo shirt epidemic at this bar. also, im pretty sure i just saw the grown-up coppertone baby
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
And I also succeeded in getting kicked out of a bar when I was drinking straight from the vodka bottle at our table.
There is this threesome scene that is literally 10 minutes of straight fucking
Omg so it's educational?
College has done two things for me. Given me the confidence to blow my nose in public and shit in public
Dude, i just watched a drag queen dropkick a motherfucker. this is a good night.
My mom just told me I look like darth vader. how's your night?
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Randomize
