she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
Bath mats should not be used at mops. they don't work. consider this a drunk psa
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
He literally just peed in a trash can in our room. It didn't even have a bag in it
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you can tell a lot about a person by the quality of their porn
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
I have to make calls today at work. So I'm gonna call your phone and leave some random messages. Just delete them.
All right well I’m making her sugar cookies and sleeping with her husband tonight. Just another manic Monday
I'm sorry about the fire. I was too fucked up to do science, apparently.
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