just a forewarning-if you come home and hang out with your stupid girlfriend the entire time that you are here/fail to get wasted with us i will wish either death upon you or that you truly do turn gay when you return to the navy.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Please send me a thumbs up pic afterwards. No homo. After you've redressed and are heading for the walk of shame out of course
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I 100% barfed while bumping the DMX remix of reading rainbow
She was going down on me before I had a chance to tell her I arrested her brother 3 hours earlier
I know! It's like he knows when my vagina wants to misbehave!
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