I don't remember. Are we still dating?
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
We should be flying into LAX instead so when we land I can turn to the right and see the Hollywood sign
You can't even see the fuckin Hollywood sign from LAX. guess she never got the memo
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
He asked me out while I'm back in town. I have to acknowledge and honor his persistence.
Your vagina must be laced with cocaine...
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
This is the Taco Bell dump we've all been waiting for.
Why do you hate her?
She's dating the best penis that has ever entered my vagina.....
Pride is not for the college student young Padawan. Tequila is for the college student.
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
Randomize
