He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I forgot my id and a man called soup is buying me vodka.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
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I used his computer to order the pizza and the only thing he had in his search bar was 'text NASA'
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
The cops spotted my on my walk of shame down the boardwalk and gave me a ride home. I'm starting to make a name for myself here.
You also spilled beer on my dog and tried to wipe it off with a paper towel but he kept getting away from you.
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This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Just went grocery shopping with a vibrator in my purse and didn't even realize it. This is what Saturdays are made for.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
Still drunk. lying on the floor just rubbing my cats nipples
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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