i permit you to call me
I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
She made me sing happy birthday to myself at the urinal.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
well some coke just fell out of my nose in my partners meeting so i'd say my day's off to a fantastic start
You were drunk at 5 You went to the dining hall and cried because your brain and fingers weren't working. Your RA came up to you and suddenly you became sober. I was very proud of you.
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
He had a small dick anyway. I'm glad I barfed on it.
I legit measured his penis against my chapstick and it was too close to call. So that was my night.
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
