She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
My last google search last night was 'vodka swimming pool'.
he called me back to his office so he could lick a line of pixie stick off of my thigh
be sure to add "office slut" to your resume
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
It's been a wonderful constant drunkeness. We played Marco polo with some random like 8 yr olds in the kiddie pool.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
Most adult booty call ever. Ha. We got down to business and still got to watch the colbert report.
Oh, and apparently I was butt ass naked and walked into the room where anna was skyping her dude in afghanistan and said "This is happening."
He just snapchatted me a picture of his cock. The angle makes it look like a freakin skyscraper. Thinking of photoshopping a little monkey on it.
he told me "apparently my gag reflex doesn't work so if you magically grew a penis I would deep throat you"
There are two guys dressed like Spartans from 300 at this bar and they're making out and I needed you to know this
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
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