At first I felt shameful, waking up naked next to a box of oreos and half a can of cake frosting...then I realized, this could be a bigger discovery than Atlantis.
After we had sex, she played this little piggy with my toes
I believe some people would call last night an orgy.
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
I feel like butter and tequila would be excellent combination. Right now. Please do this in my name.
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
Welp, I can cross "making out with a guy in a dress" off my bucket list...
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
I wrote a list of things I enjoy doing. So far it says "get high and go to museums."
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
