my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
I just farted. And everybody around me is looking at the fat girl to my left. I win.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Please explain why there is a video of you peeing in the Taco Bell bathroom on my phone? Also why did you wink at the end?
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
For a guy who won't fuck me, your dick is out a lot when we talk.
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
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Next time we do shrooms i am finding an open field at sunrise and running through it and nobody is stopping me this time!
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
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