so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
found the other keg... it's in the tree
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Sorry for walking in on you guys last night. FYI I have a bruise on my forehead from having the door slammed in my face. I deserved it.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
This spray tan I used isn't working out. I spent an hour exfoliating and rubbing the damn stuff in with rubber gloves. I wanted the alluring, sun-kissed, sexy look. I've achieved smelling like burnt popcorn and the cats won't stop licking me. I'm a salt lick for cats.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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