Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
I was going through my settings and the phone randomly started playing "Crazy Little Thing Called Love" by Dwight Yoakum. Out loud. At full volume. I was shitting. There were 3 other people in the bathroom. I love iOS 7.
You told her you double majored in Geology and Telekinesis. When has that line ever worked for you?
I miss the days where our biggest worries were who was gonna win battle shits.
Update: they told me I was twerking to twenty one pilots
I'm disgusted with myself. Who goes down on their Uber driver? This asshole
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
