problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
Star Wars means nothing to me. I know only the basics. Darth is Luke's father. R2 is short, C3 is gold. Yoda sings Rainbow Connection. The kinda stuff EVERYONE knows.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
But unlike the human Walter the plant Walter will someday grow to satisfy my needs
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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