is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.
Fun fact: Antibacterial soap will not take the combined smell of bbq sauce and vagina off your hands.
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
Jason and steven are boiling shrimp in the microwave again
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm starting to second guess shaving my vagina over the kitchen sink. The lighting is so much better though.
I tried to interpretive dance to Candy Shop to stop the awkwardness.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Throwing my sister a bisexual bachelorette party was the best idea ever. I made out with both strippers and the hot bartender promised to "gay marry" me if I take him as my date to the wedding.
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