I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I think a girl in front of me glued an ugg tag to a weird pair of boots.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
Did someone do a keg stand in my bathtub?
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
I didn't want to have shaved for no reason, so I told him I'd blow him if he would just come over and appreciate the smoothness of my legs.
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
Thank you for holding my butt in a non-sexual manner when its cold. I appreciate you and your warm hands.
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Randomize
