no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
She stopped mid-blowjob to introduce herself to us
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
Either I'm spending too much time drinking or my perfume is starting to smell like a pineapple vodka.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
Not sure, she said after cussing out the dentist they called security. Make that the first person I know 86'ed by a dentist.
Randomize
