She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
I think this is the rare instance where the babysitter should get sex as payment from the person being babysat plus you'll get birthday sex. It's a win-win.
I feel like a girl who eats her problems away with fast food.
When all else fails, you can always look down at your enormous penis.
I swear to god if you eat that last piece of pie while I'm gone I will never speak to you again. I'm so serious.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
And then I woke you by humping you to Lionel Ritchie.
Randomize
