the beds are so narrow its like a jenga threesome
i mistaked the back of her knee for her vagina
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
you turned on the Care Bears movie at 5am and kept screaming "I CARE"
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
A surprise thumb up the ass and I'm wide awake. She was right, no need for caffine pills I could fight ninjas now.
Just had to hide the fact that I'm not wearing underwear from my 7 year old niece.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
It was a recodring of you having sex ! It was like an ape and a dying mongoose at a buffet Xoxoxo
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
I wish he’d realize all I want is dick. He’s my boytoy. He’s a stunt cock. \n\nCome over, fuck me silly, eat some leftovers, fuck me again, then go back to the frat house
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