question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
I will now attempt to shave my public hair into a Christmas tree.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
He should know he can't successfully wrestle in pudding fully clothed. Amateur.
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Randomize
