...she just doesn't genetically have the things I want my kids to have.
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I woke up with his wallet, but not him. Gold-digging at it's finest.
Did you spray paint that captain morgan fifth that's in the freezer gold?
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Also, I found out tonight a major plus for being female is you can accidentally call the hot bartender sweet tits and she won't get mad.
So... Apparently, "Home" isn't the correct response when a cop asks for your address...
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
The moment when you go to plug in someone else's phone in your car and your lube is in the way. Don't mind that it's just my center console car lube. Normal.
I just had a visual of u banging and screaming at him at the same time.
Somehow I went from sitting in a car upside down to waking up in the grass surounded by paramedics. It was a great night.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
Randomize
