I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
perfect. if all else fails remind him how anxious he is. talk real fast and induce a panic attack that only I can remedy with xanax.
there's a photo set of like seven dicks covered in glitter....i don't know what to do
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
woke up in the back seat of my car with a naked chick and my brother tapping on the window. yup, what a night
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
I was so high I started singing Let It Go and then instantly started laughing 'cause I was eating ice. Everyone just stared.
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
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