how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
I just got hit by a car. I'm fine; I'll be to the bars in about 15
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Selling Girl Scout Cookies outside bars for higher than retail value has got to be the most profitable idea. Ever.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
So I have to borrow my moms car tomorrow to go pick up my ID from the strip club so I can board my plane tomorrow
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
She unfriended me four minutes after we fucked. That must be some sort of record.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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