I'm jealous of your bromance
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
Hhahaha he is. Omg the new polish friend just took his pants off in front of me. There is something wrong with this nationality.
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Hey remember that night when you sang Fergie to me? I think that's the exact moment in time when the thought "I could be faithful to this man" came into serious consideration.
She told me she was eating frosting, then I got the weirdest boner ever
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
I have no reason to put on pants anymore. This is my new reality.
My vagina knows your penis is sad about Andrew Luck. You should come over and let her comfort him in his time of need
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
