It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
i sneezed during and he said it felt like i gave birth to his dick...then asked me to do it again.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
Yeah she is in it for the money, wait til she finds out i am broke and the sex doesnt get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
The last thing I remember was talking about the economic viability of cock ring manufacturing... we had some good ideas
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I mean, with your nipple problem im surprised. #hangacoatonem
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
Randomize