Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
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Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
The least you could do is send me some gibberish so I know you're alive.
Fuhga
Thank you.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
This is why you are going on a date. To see if he is fun or if we need to shank him in the parking lot.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
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Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
I'm drunk and in a paddle boat and my friend won't quit yelling about pandas. Does this ever happen to you?
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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