She's never had brie before last night, don't know if I can date a girl that doesn't like soft cheeses.
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
I'm going to fuck my way out of the friend zone if its the last thing I do
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
I just reached for my seatbelt when I sat down to pee... Might be a little hungover.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
my vagina is starting to think like a penis, and I'm not even slightly worried
Woke up in the ER with a nurse holding my tongue together inside of my mouth and a shattered jaw, the last thing I remember is opening the 151, care to fill me in?
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
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