And then I watched some old guy get arrested for meeting some other old guy for a blow job. It was epic.
My Nuvaring birth control makes me queef.
he shattered multiple jars of jelly against his roommates doors last night. this morning the asian one wouldn't even talk to him because he thought he was gonna get beaten up
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Alright this has to stop. Without adderall I don't even have the motivation to get laid. College has ruined me.
She's making tacos & sangria tonight. I'm sure that's how the pilgrims pregamed.
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
You know it is an interesting night when the 911 operator calls you
Ok- my dad's ex-wife's Irish nephew. Weird if we fuck or not?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When was the last time you made a good decision when you could've made a shitty one
I had a salad today
Screwed a girl without a condom but hey at least you got your veggies
She had pubes that could make an episode of Duck Dynasty. Fear the Vag Beard
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
this is definitely the first time I've ever had an orgasm and then had potatoes smeared on me within the same hour
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
Help. Why am I so naked?
Randomize