His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
I woke up with a picture of my dick as my background. still wondering if it was a good night or not.
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
Did you push me into the oil wrestling or did I elect to do it?
You said you wanted to do it, but I gave you a friendly nudge.
new girl just came onto the hall stumbling drunk with no shoes on and the guy who brought her doesn't have them either
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
I just watched someone put a diaper on a cat..I'm to high for this.
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