I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
You are the worst kind of disappointment. The responsible kind.
someone needs to get her out of the garbage can shes never gonna forgive us for this
These 23 People Had Sex With Someone From Completely Different Cultures
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Some daaay... Bet your bottom dollar that some daaay you'll do that mollyyyy
25 Medical Facts That Need To Be Common Knowledge
I have to confess something, I may or may not have knocked on your window at 2:30 am while balancing on some guys hands. We found tequila.
We thought it was a good idea to send a picture to our HS science teacher where she's smoking a joint and I'm holding a monkey, and he invited us to lunch. NEW LEVEL UNLOCKED.
I can't. I'm not drunk enough for this information.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.