But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I told her Billy Mays couldn't convince me to sleep with her
I just five second ruled a donut I dropped at starbucks, everyones staring
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
That's your penis' name. I've always referred to it as Alejandro secretly.
It's like a squid of pain has attached to my head and it spreading it's whorey tentacles all over.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
Did I fall on/off the boat yesterday? Cuz my right leg looks and feels like if it got hit by shrapnel.
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
I know you saw me get knocked out after I stepped on that rake why did you leave me there
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
