your thong is hanging out like whoa
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i'm forwarding you the dirty picture of that fat girl that likes me sent . i feel like since youre my best friend you should puke in your mouth too .
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
Typical Sunday afternoon purchase of condoms and a helium tank.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
They were arguing about who would hit the piñata first so naturally you tore it open with your hands. You broke the piñata and their hearts.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
Was your bare penis on or around my blanket?
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
how do i say "cradle the balls" in Italian
Bug bite on my vagina. I think we need to stop this 'sex in awesome places campaign.'
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
