No I remember falling down the stairs I just don't remember it hurting.
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
I want to spend time with you, and by time, I mean real time. Not your dick in my mouth time.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Sounds like either a very good Friday night or a very bad Saturday morning.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
he came over last night and we fucked with the great british baking show on in the background. it was beautiful
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Randomize
