i'm pretty sure you said "blowjob marathon" lastnight
i totally said that
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
That poor kid, I literally invited myself over and took advantage of him.
yea I'm sure he was really upset some drunk girl showed up to fuck him.
Do you have to put it that way?
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You do realize that we got a stripper to do the YMCA for us on the main stage... Right?
Found my shoes and purse. They're all strapped together in my neighbor's tree. Need to borrow your ladder. Thanks in advance
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Why did I wake up in bed with the ironing board and a Mariah Carey mask? Vodka hates me
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
Haha I wasn't coming anyway. I'm watching Snow White and don't want to put pants back on. Those are completely unrelated. Have a good night.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
Randomize
