OMFG BINX FROM HOCUS POCUS IS MCGEE IN NCIS!!!!!!!! most. epic. realization. ever.
My complete lack of self respect has really improved my blow job technique
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
I had to ask him for the scissors while I was in the shower. My hood piercing was stuck in my loofah.
The guy in front of me got in the club with his green card, that's awesome
i'm going to invent a mini fridge that can hang from faucets so i don't have to get out of the bathtub anymore for a cold beer. its a million dollar idea
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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