glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I set up her keyboard so that no matter what she does, it will open up RedTube. Click and command Q all you like, its going to porn. No I play the waiting game
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Dude. Got a sore throat. Don't know if it's because my body is rejecting Michigan or cause of the bad ass blow job I gave last night
I just announced to Denny's that I'm not wearing a bra.
Randomize
