Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
Did yall have sex?
Well we both woke up naked and there was a condom wrapper on the floor, but I don't remember so does that count?
Def not... that's how I managed to keep my number under 10 for all of college- If you don't remember, it didn't happen
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i just deleted quailman, hot hawaiian dude, appalachian swimmer, and connecticut from my phone
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
He's bought his dick a cell phone. A cell phone. For his dick...
He gave me the number and told me that I if I want to hook up again, I have to call his penis.
I asked him how his night was and he sent me a picture of a bottle of Ciroc with a bendy straw...
I'm drinking nothing but vodka and coffee for the next 48 hours. For science.
In the world of sexual, erotic texting, you rank somewhere between "how much teeth do you want" and "how dry do you want it"
How high is the bridge and how deep is the water and what are the chances I will get arrested
i refuse to sex anyone who doesn't get my lord of the rings references. no exceptions.
I almost had sex at the fire station last night and I need you to acknowledge all the awesomeness that is in that sentence.
I hate political talk. I just wanna get fucked into an alternate universe where Bernie Sanders is president.
Randomize
