don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
He's warming up to shark week, by only eating fish and drinking vodka, and all the time he keeps yelling "death to the seals!"
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
Fat girl left in a hurry. Possibly had to do with the missing bathroom door in my apartment.
You know, there is no convenient place for your beer when you are on shrooms taking a shower.
2 more and I will have fucked 75 percent of my acting class. best. elective. ever.
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
The front camera on the 5S is SO much better. This is great development for my international sexting.
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
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