I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
forecast for tonight- shitshow with a chance of tbell
my version of bright and sunny.
Drunk in some girls audi what the fuck is happenin i love sb
it's ELEVEN
thirty
He keeps apologizing for not being able to get hard when he's drunk. We havent even left the club yet.
so we told my parents we were going trick or treating. got high as shit at some playground. and then bought our own candy so we looked legit when we got home.
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
If I was a guy I'd keep a condom in my pocket, in my wallet, in my backpack, in my car, in my shoe, behind my fucking ear
Basically I will actually need a reindeer pulled sleigh to make it to all the penises in one night.
Okay, first we buy a pirate outfit and then we get drunk, you in or you out?
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
Randomize
